HD changed me. There had to be some reason for the outbursts. I would get up in the morning and say to my family, 'Today I won't yell', but I did. The violence, the yelling and the shouting. Then I was diagnosed, and now the medication has made me a better person.

My husband and I stayed married for thirty years until we separated. I don't remember some of the things I did, I was just violent. I've learnt a lot of things I wish I could go back and change, but I can't. I can't fix any of the past faults. I was talking to him at Christmas time; he's really happy.

I knew there was something wrong with my father and that it wasn't just old age or a bad temper. But he was never diagnosed, and it wasn't until my half-sister began to show symptoms that we knew HD was in the family. I now have brothers who have also been diagnosed. My mother died when my brother and I were very young. I was only five. I had the most wonderful step-mother you could ever have. She was so wonderful, she raised us all equally. She never raised her voice and she was always there for us. But she suffered unbelievably at the hands of my father, but she loved him. Also, the fact that she had my brother and me and four children with my father, meant that she could never leave him.

My youngest brother and I are very close. He got to a stage where he didn't want to know about HD but he has actually now faced it. He is now at peace with himself, his family and the HD. My sister, who was the first to be diagnosed, found it hard because a lot of people didn't understand HD at that time. She lost a lot of her friends and so has my brother.

I have two children, a son and a daughter. When I was diagnosed, my son asked me how I wanted to be treated. I said, 'The day that I tell you I need help is the day you can give it to me.' I have five grandchildren and most of them are aware of the HD. The others will be told when they are a bit older.

I have a problem accepting HD in so much as I can't do anything about it, and that's not me. That's just not me. I should be able to control it, but you can't. I think I've always known that there was something there, but I always hoped it was just bad temper.

The only time I feel really upset is when I'm in the shops and some child will pass a comment. That's hurtful, but I know now that I've just got to live with it.

Sometimes when things go wrong I feel like taking my own life. But when my son was fourteen or fifteen years old, one of his friends committed suicide. Since then my son says that suicide is a coward's act. I always tell my son that I would never take my own life because you would call me a coward. That keeps me safe, but it doesn't stop the thoughts. And the fact that I live alone isn't the best; I sometimes feel lonely and have too much time to think.

My symptoms are not as bad as my sister's or brother's symptoms. When I think of my life now and what it will be like in the future, I think of it as being a bit frightening in some ways. I've sometimes questioned whether the doctors got the right results because sometimes I feel guilty that my symptoms aren't as severe as my sister's or brother's symptoms.

I cope by calling AHDA to talk things through; I find that helpful. But other times I get up and go for a walk or work in the garden. I don't drive anymore. When I did I was a shocking driver – I shouldn't have had my licence even before I was symptomatic! But I ended up having an accident and I decided that I needed to give up driving.

I believe that you must have certain things in life. You need someone to talk to, so when you pick up the phone you know that you're not alone. You've got to have people and a doctor you can trust. I always trusted the doctor; I have such faith in him. I have always had AHDA and the workers there as well.

It's important to talk with people who care. People with HD are able to tell whether a person cares or not. You must see past the HD and view people who are affected by it as humans too. I'm going to have a go at putting that message across.